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A question that a lot of young women ask
is why do men behave unfairly?. There has been a lot
of research looking at this question, and one of the answers
may be that young men see themselves as number one in relationships
with women. |
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Young men pick up these ideas from
many areas in their lives for example watching their father and
how he behaves with their mother and sisters. In some families
boys are seen as more important than girls and they are encouraged
to be "in charge" and not do "women's work"
such as child-care, housework and taking responsibility for their
own and others' problems. In some families there are very clear
rules about what is "women's work" and what is "men's
work." |
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Young men may also hear these ideas
from other men's conversations which suggest "men should
be in charge" if they have a relationship with a woman. |
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Young men don't necessarily have
to see "men as the boss" in their own family to pick
up these ideas because there are plenty of these messages in
other areas of their lives such as films, television, school,
and newspapers. |
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How do these ideas of "men
being in charge" affect young adults' relationships? This may mean
that when women express strong views of what they want and consider fair,
young men could see this as a challenge to them being
"in charge". This may mean young men taking steps to
stay in charge and may include using different types of disrespectful
or controlling behaviours. |
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Young men who use these ideas are
rewarded with having things happen that suit them and give them
maximum control over how things will be. It is easy to see why
men may choose to use strategies to maintain control especially
when there is so much support for them in our world to maintain
this traditional male role. However, an interesting question
is why do some boys choose not to behave unfairly to their girlfriends?
If you have any ideas go to the Girl's Stories and
complete where it asks "Tell us your story about a FAIR
relationship". |
